|I apparently dislocated my hip by two feet|
|relocating hip with playground vicegrips|
Two kids later, we waltzed. The first few brutal turns involved elbows and bruising. And I turned to him and hissed, "Why the hell are you trying to beat me up?" And he, just as mad, says, "Why would I beat you up? And in public?" "THAT's What I'm asking YOU." And then we changed partners, thank god. Eventually I learned that I was going to have to submit to my leader, and soon, my lip-licking concentration gave way to a zen-y zoned-out-ness. I look like I've just had a lobotomy. And in a way, I have. In order for me to follow, I must turn off every spigot of thought in my brain and let my body respond to the jerks, squeezes, and after several years of work, the gentle nudgings of my partner. I become a dancing blow-up doll.
But sometimes, I want to "re"gain control of my body, which is really a stupid impulse because of my total lack of ability to control my body. I had a dawning sensation once that I was no longer feeling fancy, or graceful as I'd learned dancing could make me feel. And I said to Huck, "Darling, it feels like I'm just walking backwards. What's going on?" "We're dancing," but his teeth were gritted. "This doesn't feel like dancing. This feels like walking." "You were having trouble with the rhythm so I've simplified." "Well, it feels like BS."
I like the partner switching of dance lessons. You get a feel for the overall personality of all the men in the room. Control freaks and wet noodles and all spots in between. Since I'd been to India, I always liked chatting with this one guy from there. But he was extremely short, even for an Indian. And I happened to be his partner when we learned a dip. Yes, the tallest girl in the class and the shortest man in what turns out to be a physical impossibility. I was feeling large and I'm sure he was feeling puny and I think we were both thinking the same thing, "HELP!" when the male instructor finally glanced our way and screamed like a girl: "OH MY GOD! Switch Partners!"