Friday, September 7, 2012

Summer summary: Doctor Silverwood floats cute condoms

Those rascally, meddling kids are back to school now after the best summer ever.  Meanwhile, I've turned aimless and pointless, waiting for my new balance to arrive.  While my brain re-organizes itself around this new reality, lets review some of what you missed.

Blue went on this twice!
* Silverwood.  I usually cringe at the massive, frivolous, unnecessary use of resources represented by theme parks, however, I found myself marveling this year at all the sensations we humans like to experiment with: rushing, spinning, upside down, that sensation you get when you're driving out in the country and the road suddenly dips. 

*Dr. Who.  So the kids bought a Wii with their own money saved up from Christmases and Birthdays. So on Coyote's birthday, for a surprise, I finally agreed to their plan (it wasn't his gift, just a bonus activity). Surprise! Mom gets to say YES! And Coyote goes all quiet, tears in his eyes.
 "What's wrong, Coyote?  Don't you want a Wii?  You've been begging for one for two years straight."
*SIGH* "I really wanted an X-box."
oh, the up-sell.  

 Why are we now opening the doors of our family's brains to this schlock?  Because this is their generation, not ours.  This is the society they are growing up in. I feel entitled to control the inflow of technology, to teach limits.  But I no longer feel entitled to deny it completely.
After watching Coyote's classmates all know the words to Wii dance songs sung at his "End of Second Grade" talent show, except Coyote.
After seeing Coyote's obsession with gaming and electronics.
And seeing that the future most likely is computer based, and most jobs in it will involve extensive familiarity with computers. And knowing people who have made a very very fine living through gaming, Google, etc.
After allowing gaming on Kongregate, Cool Math, Manga High, etc via internet...the big, scary, totally child-inappropriate internet. (We have been teaching internet safety, but then Coyote has these questions and you think, "MY GOD! NO, SON, NOOO! You can't really win things in pop-up windows!"  And you think, "Why are you asking me my email address?"  And you have to repeat, "No, you can't surf Youtube without my supervision."
After I'd observed the cool, co-operative, active gaming of Wii's.
It seemed it was time.  Their world is not going to be my world.  I can't control the sweep of fate, of history, of culture.  But I can teach limits, and to do that, we need to wade in at least ankle deep.
Unfortunately, the Wii also allows Netflix streaming, and years and years of Dr. Who.  And I am totally addicted and unfit to teach limits on technology.


San Diego Boogie Boardes
* Little Spokane rafting.  On the final float of the summer last week, with my sister and my kids, we were stalked for an hour by a very curious Great Blue Heron.  And we met a moose sunning himself on the bank just a few feet from our rafts.

*Cute Babies.  During our annual "summer's cleanse", I discovered a small journal documenting the cute little phrases, performances and deeds of our once-upon-a-time wee ones.  I am a little jealous about people who have tiny tots and Facebook.  My kids don't say cutesy little things anymore.  And I never got the chance to tell the world about their adorable pitter-pattering  brains spewing hilarity.  But, here, I'm going to try it out now.  Here are some cute mid-kid brainisms from last night:
Coyote: "OLD FASHIONED VANILLA? YESSSS! I hate new fashioned vanilla."
Blue: working on her parody of "I'm sexy and I know it," Also referred to as "I'm a parody and I know it."
Here's hers: "I'm Velma and I know it."
"Jinks! Look at that monster! (repeat until done)
Uh-huh - I'm freaked out (repeat until done)
I walk into a cave and what do I see?
A scary monster staring back at me!
I've got brains behind my glasses
And I'm not afraid to show it, show it, show it.
I'm Velma and I know it."

The Cataldo Mission
*Condoms.  At Mission Beach one night we overheard a group of younger guys walking by, "Yeah,  He said the party last night was so wild, he used an entire box of condoms!"  My, my! So many things may contribute to using an entire box of condoms in one night that do NOT mean the party was wild.  Did he have trouble putting them on?  Were they all old?  A box of 3 or a box of 36?
But then I realized: Holy Moley!  He's bragging about condom use!  YES! YES!  You use that whole box, boy!  You use all of them at once, or in succession.  A small box. A big box.  A blue box.  And gold box.  Whatev's!  The boy is using condoms. Condoms are now proof of how wild the party was!  Condoms made it! GOOO condoms!





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